Quarter Century Clarity

I spent my entire childhood attending religious private schools and hearing the same refrain from every adult and spiritual leader around me: I don’t like religion, I am not spiritual, I am young and ignorant. I experienced many conversations that held a demeaning tone of “Oh, you’ll understand with time, little one…” In fact, I did begin to understand with time. Just not in the way that they would have liked.

As an individual who has always been committed to my own growth, I have constantly questioned and examined the religious obligations placed upon me. As a child, the obligation that bothered me most was observing the Sabbath. I have always been completely entranced by video games, and so the inclusion of a 25-hour Sabbath every weekend, when I was not allowed to use electricity, let alone play on the computer, was something I definitely wasn’t a fan of. Back then, my opposition against religion stemmed from disliking how my freedom was being restricted. I wouldn’t be surprised if my initial objection to the Sabbath’s restrictions planted the seed for my deep appreciation of freedom today.

From an early age, I was at odds with the environment around me. But did that mean that I “hated” where I found myself? Did I hate my religion? Does my lack of religious practice make me dislike religion and spirituality? I believe not. Even though I am still young and ignorant to many, I would argue that through my perspective and secularism I have grown to love my religion and religion in general. I acknowledge and am extremely grateful for the morality and ethical thought that my religious background has provided me. And yes, if and when I start a family, I intend to bestow the same moral compass to my children as I believe it to be a very positive one. But that does not mean that I will actively practice the faith and obligations.

Religious structure and obligations are a useful tool for teaching a strong sense of community, morality, and ethics, especially to children, but they are not required. The Atheist child does not think murder is more acceptable than the Jewish child. To think that would be the case would be to argue that two people of different backgrounds cannot hold the same morality as each other. If this were the case, then no two people of different ethnicities could ever hold a close relationship to one another. Something we all know to be false.

And so while I identify as a spiritual person and not specifically a religious one, I consider them to be two closely related parties. My spirituality and internal philosophy could easily be described as my own religion. I practice the tools that I’ve learned from Judaism the same way that I practice my Taoist teachings. My combination of the different philosophies and practices that I have been exposed to throughout my life have given me the ability to create a lifestyle for myself that does not feel forced.

I argue that validating genuine religious questioning would benefit everyone and give those who struggle with restrictions new perspectives, helping those of us called “young and ignorant” still feel part of our communities.